My 50 Shades - Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

I fall into my unmade dorm room bed, grateful for an ever-absent roommate. I'm exhausted and confused about the night's events. What did I just do?  I sigh, close my eyes trying to figure out how it happened. 

Troy is an all-American man; tall, blonde hair, glasses that make him look "smart," drives a jeep, fraternity boy, *sigh* simply adorable. We’ve been dating for a few weeks, have had enjoyed many sexual encounters together. I’m younger than him, though still a freshman in college, I’m still 17, and he’s 21 and I have the strangest feeling that I’m driving the sexual relationship, teaching him even. Silly, isn't it? I’m not that experienced, though I know what I like, and am very experimental. 

On this particular Friday night, Troy took me to his frat house to hang out, drink, whatever stupid college kids do. We had downed many a Keystone Light, played some quarters, and his frat brothers were calling it a night. "You wanna stay?" Troy asked me expectantly, his green eyes boyish and hopeful beneath his wire-rimmed glasses. 

I smirked and raised my eyebrow, "To do what?" Intent clear in my voice. I could imagine tying him up, ravaging his body, or teasing him all night . . . oh the possibilities. He blushed a little. He blushes! It's so cute, and makes me want to devour him. Feigning coy, I cocked my head, shuffled one foot on the floor and sweetly said, "Take me to your room." He smiled his somewhat dorky, but adorable smile, took my hand and pulled me up the stairs towards his room. I pushed him against the wall in the upstairs hall, on my tip-toes, reaching up to kiss him hard, groping his crotch, feeling how hard he was already. 

We pushed through into his room, still groping each other like horny teenagers, despite the fact that I WAS a horny teenager. As we stumbled into his room, we almost fall over his roommate, Aaron. Fuck. An awkward moment of Troy and Aaron nonverbally communicating their independent desires passed, I pretended not to notice, most likely poorly. Troy took Aaron by the arm, escorting him into the hall, "Would you excuse us?" he said slightly embarrassed. I kicked off my shoes and sat cross legged on Troy's bed, listening to their fervent whispers. I'm buzzed, not quite drunk, I thought Troy was, hell I thought everyone was, apparently Aaron just likes to get baked in his room alone; the smell of pot still lingering in the air. I stole a peek into the bedside drawer, nothing interesting, only books, some porn and condoms. Glancing around the room, I noticed how dirty it is. Ugh. Boys. Not that I can judge, by dorm room is a perpetual nightmare. 

Troy and Aaron came back in, an odd look on their faces. Guilt? Worry? Curiosity? I can't tell. I eyed them suspiciously. "So, Aaron and I were wondering something..." Troy said with a certain amount of trepidation. I raised both eyebrows in anticipation of the remaining sentence. He looked nervous. What fucker? I have needs damnit. 

"Wanna have a threesome?" blurted out by the stoned and ever eloquent Aaron. I froze. A threesome? I had never had a threesome, though when I fantasized about them it was always with two women and one man. I looked at these eager boys in front of me, and I was nervous, worried that they had all these expectations I was unable to fulfill. My mind flooded with scenes from pornos - a girl on her back being fucked, with a cock rammed down her throat. I worked to keep my poker face. I don't want a cock rammed down my throat while I'm being fucked. It all sounds just too... like there's just too much cock in this equation. My mind races. What if I say no? Will Troy not want to see me anymore? What if I say yes? Does that make me an über whore? FUCK!! 

A lightning bolt of inspiration hit me. I smiled, evil intent all over my face, sat up, and folded my hands in my lap, confidence dripped off of me. "So you boys want a threesome with me tonight? I'd be willing to do that, but you have to do some things for me first." Their faces became increasingly eager, hungry.

"What do you want us to do?" Aaron responded first, lust oozed out of him. 

"Whatever you want." Troy chimed in, equally eager.

A fire burned inside of me, the thought of them doing whatever I said created an arousal in me like I had never felt. There was a rush of adrenaline, of pure sex resonating through me, making me tingle and wet. I bit my lip sensually, no hesitation, “Kneel, facing each other.” They looked perplexed, but did so.

"Aaron, I want you to take off Troy's shirt." I said with cool determination.

They collectively froze, I raised my eyebrow, "You said whatever I want." My look was insistent, this wasn't a request. With some hesitation, Aaron reached for Troy's shirt, Troy was already starting to take it off. 


"No!" I warned him, "I want HIM to take it off. And I want it to make ME hot." . . . pause for effect . . . "really hot." said in my best seductress tone. Troy promptly stopped, leaving Aaron to pull the t-shirt over his head, his chest now bare, his erect nipples poking out among his blonde chest hair. 

I smiled, tilted my head, "Mmmm... nice," I voiced in approval. My earlier rush was like a small creek flowing, and this was feeling like Yosemite Falls. I can't believe they're doing this! It's intoxicating, gripping me like nothing else ever has. My mouth slightly parted, "Now Troy, you take off Aaron's." It's hard to conceal the excitement in my voice. I moved closer, intentionally out of reach, but able to smell them both, they were musky, delicious. Troy regarded me with a longing in his eyes, but he didn’t waiver from his task, he tenuously removed Aaron’s shirt, revealing his dark, curly chest hair though his muscular form was clearly visible. I moaned low in approval, they looked in my direction, unsure, awaiting further instruction.

I joined them on the floor kneeling and touched both of their chests, they jointly groaned, leaning in to me. I pushed them back, took Troy’s hand and placed it on Aaron’s chest, whispering close to his ear, my breath licking his skin, “Touch him how you’d touch me.” He explored my face, confused but his desire was obvious, I nodded my head, gently coaxing him. Troy took his hand and began gingerly touching Aaron’s bare chest, his fingers circling in the dark, coarse hair. Aaron’s face was tense, but as Troy stroked down his entire chest, the tension released and turned to pleasure. I licked my lips, not unnoticed by Troy, encouraging him to proceed. He lightly brushed his hand over Aaron’s chest, down his stomach and back up, spreading out to his arms, dragging his nails down Aaron’s firm biceps. Fuck! He’s never done that with me. Mmmm… I wouldn’t say no to it either.

“Take off his jeans,” I directed Troy. Without delay, he reached down and popped the button, clumsily lowered the zipper and looked at me expectantly. “Well take them off for Christ’s sake.” I said in a mildly irritated tone. They both scrambled awkwardly, clearly uncomfortable with this scenario, yet not protesting it one bit.

Do they like this? My question was immediately answered as Aaron’s erection was obvious through his tighty whiteys. A fiery smirk spread across my face, he shrugged in acknowledgement. Oh I see how this is going to go. No thought about whether they’re gay, or whether this is wrong, my id is in full control, driving me and these lustful balls of hormones. It’s thrilling, their eager reactions to my words, my expressions. I’m wrapped up in a swirling tornado of lust, energy, desire, wanting. Wanting? Wanting of what? I realized at that moment I didn’t want either of these boys before me to sexually satisfy me by their actions, but I wanted them to obey me. The rush of their obedience was consuming me, making me red hot, wet and eager in my own way, pushing me to drive them forward. What else will they do? My mind overflowed with possibilities.

“Kiss him,” I said to no one in particular, it was irrelevant. I wanted to watch them kiss, see if they’d engage in something so intimate. Troy leaned in first, no hands, just his lips upon Aaron’s, it was a celibate, unimpressive kiss. I frowned, in a moment of fire and irritation, I grabbed Aaron’s neck kissing him hard, forcing my tongue into his willing mouth. He returned the kiss, reaching his hands to my hips, pulling me towards him, I pushed him back roughly indicating this wasn’t a competition, I was in charge, full stop. Another forceful kiss, my tongue invading his mouth, he was actively participating, trying to battle my tongue for dominance, some kind of control. I grabbed his hair hard, pulling him back slightly, granting access to his neck, where I bit and sucked resulting in moans from him and whimpers from Troy. I released him, playfully bit his lip, looked at Troy my eyes smoldering and said, “Can you manage anything like that?” It was a teasing, playful comment, but intended to make his ire rise thus propelling him to perform more admirably. He jumped to the task with enthusiasm, poor Aaron was almost knocked over by Troy’s eager leap. They began kissing. It was primal, guttural, I watched with an increasingly unattached interest, as if it was a science experiment blooming before my eyes. It wasn’t hot or arousing in the way that porn is, but the fact that they would glance in my direction occasionally gave my stomach a flutter of excitement. They’re doing this for me. They want to turn me on. I licked my lips and nodded so they’d know continuing was desired.

Their kissing intensified, Aaron gripped Troy’s head, Troy’s hand wandered down Aaron’s body, stroking the outline of his stiffness apparent through his underwear. My breathing quickened, not because what they were doing was enticing, but because they were doing it for me, to please me, obeying me. I was becoming giddy, drunk with power, and I liked it almost too much.

“Aaron, his pants.” My chin pointed to Troy and Aaron responded by quickly ripping open Troy’s jeans, the less than graceful scene of Troy stumbling as he laid back to slide them off made me chuckle, though he didn’t blush.

Before me knelt two attractive fraternity boys erect and ready in nothing but their underwear doing what I said, everything I said. Unbelievable! There was a sense of triumph in this moment, but I’m not sure why. I sat back casually, tilting my head with a smirk to watch their next set of moves. “Troy, I want to watch you stroke his cock.” I bit my lips closed, hiding the shock that I had said these words. Do I really want this? How will I feel about it tomorrow? I tell myself to shut-up because regardless of the fallout, I’m enjoying this moment now. Troy complied. Aaron was longer and thicker than Troy, it wasn’t gigantic, but it looked tempting. Troy’s pale hand stood out in slight contrast to Aaron’s natural olive skin tone. Aaron was moaning in appreciation of each stroke. Each stroke came faster and I could hear Troy’s hand slam down against Aaron’s body harder and faster. It wasn’t beautiful. Aaron’s face was scrunched up in pleasure, but it didn’t look alluring to me.

I regarded them clinically for a moment. Each grunt, groan and moan were genuine, though they didn’t resonate with my own desire. I watched how Troy gripped Aaron, and how they both responded as if it was a learning exercise more than a pleasurable experience. If I didn’t focus on the specific acts, but more on the fact that this was all happening because of me, I was able to enjoy it much more. You see, it wasn’t sexy to watch these two men touch each other, though I thought in some way it would be. They were inelegant, lacking in nuance and grace, it didn’t sing to me, make me want to come and play, but I was still incredibly aroused by it all on an odd cerebral level. Their compliant and willing attitudes made my body come alive with sexual energy. My breathing staggered as I watched him get stroked, as I looked at Troy’s intensity in his performance. I was enthralled by them, by this feeling filling me up. It scared me. There's something wrong with you.

Once Aaron had cum messily all over Troy’s hand and partially on Aaron’s own stomach, Aaron began stroking Troy. Perhaps he did so out of reciprocity, as I hadn’t indicated he do so. Aaron was even less sensual in his stroking, it was very “wham bam, thank you ma’am,” and left me feeling very empty. After watching Troy cum with his signature “O face” I had an uncontrollable desire to leave.

How could I leave when all of this started with a promise for a threesome? I couldn’t stay, I knew that. I stood, touched Troy’s cheek, leaned down to kiss him and said, “Baby, it’s really late, I gotta go.” His shocked expression gave me butterflies. I knew I had done something wrong, but I wasn’t sure which part was the worst, the leaving or the making them do all of that. I stood, grabbed my bag and left without so much as looking at Aaron. As I walked out, I couldn’t look at Troy. This might be the last time you see him. I refused to entertain the thought. Maybe they’re too drunk to remember, I hoped.

 

The sun wakes me earlier than I might like, my eyes open and I wonder about the night before again. I still don’t understand it. Why was it so arousing for me in a certain way? My sorority sisters don’t do things like this, well I don’t think they do anyway. Confusion still plagues me, and I’m worried if I’ll ever see Troy again. I sigh and opt for a shower to help clear my head.

The shower is no help at all, though being clean feels good. I resign myself to a day of studying alone in my dorm as an attempt to avoid people, mostly Troy. Way to go, genius. You always gotta figure a way to screw things up with a good guy, don’t you? My inner voice is big on tough love.

Around eight o’clock in the evening I realize I’m starving and haven’t eaten all day. Another genius move, the cafeteria’s closed now. I huff at myself, gather my things and head out the door in a quest for some Doritos at the corner market. College is all about eating healthy.

As I bolt out of my dorm room, I crash into Troy. I’m surprised, “Troy!” I try to look confident, “What are you doing here?” This is a legitimate question as he goes to a different school at least 10 miles away.

He looks a little embarrassed, which only enhances his cute looks, “I…um… I just wanted to see if you were okay.”

“Troy, you could’ve called for that.” I sound harsher than I feel, I need to rectify this. I put my hand on his arm, “But I’m glad you came, I was just going to grab something to eat. Wanna come?” I’m hopeful but not really expectant. I’m sure he only came in person to be a decent guy and dump me face to face. I mean, who wouldn’t dump a girl after the bullshit I pulled last night?

He smiles a genuine smile, “Yeah, I’d like that.” He would? Really? It might be to dump you anyway. I smile but I still don’t trust it. What if this is a “Carrie” moment or something? Regardless of my fears, he takes my hand and we walk to his car.

We pull into the parking lot of the tiny Italian restaurant he took me to for our first real date. I smile with the fond memories of that night.

“Why are you smiling?” Troy asks with genuine curiosity.

“Oh…” I stammer. Just tell him. Why must I always keep things in my head? “I was just thinking of our first date.” I blurt it out, almost too fast to comprehend. He smiles, takes my hand and kisses it. It makes me feel warm and special.

“I like that memory too.” He discloses as he begins to exit the Jeep. “Wait! Will you let me get the door for you please?” There’s demonstrable desire for him to prove his chivalry. I give him a half smile and roll my eyes, but stay seated in the car until he walks around and opens my door. In my most ladylike way, I swing my legs out and exit. I’m going for an air of royalty about me.

“Why thank you dear sir,” I curtsy as he takes my hand.

“Smart ass.”

I shrug in affirmation before he kisses me, takes my hand and we head into the restaurant.